This week I have stared actual fear in the face , not once but a few times. No, I didn't skydive or swim next to a shark ...I handed over my car keys to my about to be 16 year old son. I have had 11 months to wrap my head around the fact that he is old enough to drive, but lucky for me he is a procrastinator(this is a euphemism for lazy)and just got his permit this week, 28 days before his 16th birthday. So, after 2 failed road rules tests (one of which I paid 26.00 for, the other I paid 10.00 for..but I digress), and 75 proof of identifications and residencies, the state of Florida presented him with a Florida Learner's permit. Which basically says , here you go buddy. learn how to drive for the next year with your parents in the passenger seat cheering (shaking) you on!
We were not 10 minutes down the road from the DMV and he asks to drive the rest of the way home. What??? You really want to drive? On a real road, with real vehicles being piloted by real assholes? This is not an opinion, it is an actual collection of data that I got from watching what exactly was walking in the DMV while I waited for my son to pass his test. One out of every 7 people looked like they were mentally and physically able to drive a car. The rest of them looked ,shall we say, sketchy at best. So, after a few minutes of deliberation, I mapped out the easiest route home which would involve no left turns, no crossing extrememly large intersections and absolutely, under no circumstances, no Bruce B Downs Blvd(New Tampa moms, you understand..), and this route was a straight 1.8 mile route to my house coming from his high school. That's all I was willing to partake in at the time. I mean, that is really the only place he has to get to and from anyway, so he may as well start there. He was disappointed at my cautiousness but I could see on his face he would take what he could get ffrom a woman who still watches him walk down the street at night when he goes to a friend's house. I could almost hear the voice in his head saying"baby steps for crazy mommy". Well, he drove home and I survived. I sat on my hands, I bit my lip, I prayed and my head was literally on a swivel but I survived.
I walked into the house behind my 6 foot tall son, who now could drive a car. Granted, he had a lot to learn, like not driving so close to the curb, stopping a little slower at the
lights but as all drivers know, experience is the only teacher for this situation. I told him I was poud of him and that he did a great job and I meant it. I posted the obligatory proud parent picture on facebook, and his brother and sister cheered for him as well. It was a milestone, they just keep happening . I thought once they walked, talked and pooped by themselves there wasnt much left to actually feel so proud and scared about at the same time. I was wrong.
Other than the boy who hasn't cared when Im going to the grocery store next to now taking a real interest in when I will be entering the car again so he can drive me there, he's the same kid. He's my blonde haired. blue eyed guy driving his little tykes car around the living room waiting for me to make his dinner, smiling and watching my every move. That's what I will always see no matter what he's driving.It goes fast and even though I am scared to let him out on the road with the many aforementioned assholes I know it is a part of growing up , and that is more important than my fear of letting go. Here's to the next chapter!
